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balance (2): off we go

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

off we go

left my little island home for bangkok today in a completely scattered and unprepared frame of mind. my friend nataly drove me to the pier in torrential rain, deftly avoiding floods, landslides, and fallen trees despite the fact that her windshield wipers weren't working and i was screeching like a banshee in the back seat. perfect time to leave thong nai pan- that lovely rainy season i mentioned last entry has decided to turn bad quick. i felt a bit guilty leaving little m alone in my house, where he will most likely be trapped, horrifically lonely and bored out of his mind for the next 9 weeks. i promised to send him books on web design from bangkok so he can occupy his time learning. worried for my poor dogs as well, especially 'sick', who i sadly fear will soon be 'dead'. :( i had no choice but to leave him suffering in the cold and wet with a horrible immune disorder which has his head swollen horrifically and all his fur gone. sad little family of mine. never before have i felt such regret at leaving "home".

on the way to bangkok i discovered i have a worrying new fear of flying! doesn't help that i have recently watched 'united 93' and 'air crash investigations', not to mention countless reports of china airlines' bad safety record. hoping i can get some sort of anti-panic-attack meds from the hospital when i go in for travel shots tomorrow, as every little bit of turbulence on my hour flight today had me with a death grip on the seat in front of me and completely forgetting to breathe. don't know how i can handle 27 hours of that on the trip to NY! have a couple days here to try and get my shit together before then.

x wrote me and said "isn't it always at the last minute before a trip that you come to your senses and think 'wtf' am i doing?!?!" ha....


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