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balance (2): i heart NY (really)

Sunday, September 26, 2004

i heart NY (really)

so new york is nice with the painted concrete and the constant movement of things. ...there is a lot of art, magic... a lot of everything....

but the area in which i would like to have a drop down, drug out fight with this city (and hopefully kill it or myself) is that in regards to the people.

maybe it's people in my age range, maybe i just don't meet enough of them... but the ones i do meet either i have little in common with, or if i remotely relate to them are pretentious, superficial losers. i don't want casual friendships where when you run into each other you check for all the accessories and drop a few common names. walk off and talk shit about the person you just met... i like people who care about me because i care about them. i expect that people be honest and open. i expect that people will do what they say they will do (i am occasionally guilty of not too but some people habitually flake). i expect people to love life and push ahead into it and not be pacified with the same group of colorful, loud, usually drunk idiots they hang out with and do the same mindlessly hyped things over and over. i think sex is fun but not the point of my existence. i expect people to have identities of their own. i expect them to return my kindness and generosity with the same... or at least a bit of acknowledgement. i expect people to seek out and do new things, i expect compassion and diplomacy. in short, i would like to be treated as human just once...ugh.

not everywhere in the world has this problem, thank 'god'.

i do have a couple of friends whom i rarely see but love, who fall into the opposite category (the good one). katie, who is beautiful and much braver, free spirited, and more well adjusted than i am. we went to salivate over gael garcia bernal in the movie about che guevara (the motorcycle diaries), and then talked for like 6 hours last night. i love katie.... ted, who sends me all the political info so i remain informed, and who takes great pictures of his own respective trips (here). angel who lives up to his name and is always happy and cute. patrick who is sleazy and has a gay bent but treats hairstyling like and art and will chat with me about everything, a couple others (hi helen)....and of course x. my friendly siamese twin. who is bravely fighting off gangsters in the heat of jamaica right now.

the rest of them can kiss my ass... i'm out of here! :)

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